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Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Decluttering And Packing Up His Stuff


I mentioned a few months ago that Mike and I were in the process of getting divorced.

It's really been a huge upheaval in my life for more reasons than one, to put it lightly.

Mike moved out a few months ago, but didn't take more than the bare minimum with him, since his living conditions were still temporary.

While my current home is nearly twice the size of my last one, it is still quite small for our family of five (about 900 square feet) and therefore can get quite packed and cramped relatively quickly.

A friend came over the other day to try to help me out, and she suggested that we pack up Mike's things and declutter and organize my bedroom. This was a really good suggestion, because my room is the smallest room in the house, and having an extra person's belongings in it just made it harder to live in. Additionally, my friend pointed out that packing up his things and moving them out of my bedroom would make me feel freer emotionally, without having all that excess mental baggage in my life and in my personal space.

She was right.

We spent an afternoon packing and packing and decluttering and reorganizing and it feels so good.

While doing that, I also decluttered my things, removing clothes and other things that I no longer use, and put them in a bag to give away.

And when that was done, I reorganized the kitchen, taking out all the mountain of cleaning supplies Mike had purchased from under the sink, none of which I use (I'm a dish soap, baking soda, toilet cleaner, and floor soap kind of girl). I asked him if he wanted them, and he said he didn't, so I gave them all away to people in my community via a local giveaway group. And then I reorganized under the sink so I could store my towels there, as well as cleaning supplies that I do use.

I would love to say that my head feels so much freer with out all these stuff in my space, but unfortunately that isn't the case. I still have all of Mike's things packed up waiting to be picked up either by his brother or family members or by moving professionals. In the meantime, until that happens, my storage space is filled to the brim with all those things.

But even though they aren't out of my house, getting those things out of my living space definitely felt like a nice positive step in the right direction, in helping me get closure, or at least as much closure as I can get while still going through the divorce process.

It was quite an emotional experience, I must say, and it did put me in a funk afterwards. I was warned by my friends that it could happen, and it did. So if you are going through something similar, be kind to yourself and understand that packing up the possessions of a former loved one of yours can stir up lots of emotions, and give yourself time to feel.

There still are even more of his things in the house that I'll need to pack up still, but this was the big bulk of it, and I'm glad I got it done.


4 comments:

  1. My heart goes out to you, divorce especially when there are children, is so hard. Congratulations on doing it with class.

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  2. It is hard .You will get through it!Hugs to you

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  3. I'm glad it was a positive experience, at least mostly. I think it's a hard thing to do, regardless of the circumstances. Even if everything is 100% amicable, it's still a transition and it's hard. I think it's the same when a loved one passes away and you have to clean out there things. We often have so much emotional baggage residing in those items.

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  4. This must have been an emotional roller coaster for you. I hope you can begin the healing process and find the strength to move forward.You are a person of great courage.

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