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Wednesday, October 30, 2019

Single Mom's Day Out


I feel incredibly blessed.

As a single mom, things are not easy. One of the hardest parts is feeling so isolated. There's the fact that you're doing everything alone, without a partner to take some of the mental burden off of you. You're the one in charge of everything, it all falls on you. No partner to tag team with.

But in addition to that difficulty, there's the aspect that even your good friends sometimes aren't enough. Because no matter how much they're there for you, they don't really know what its truly like to go through what you're going through, unless they're a single mom themselves. Its a challenge that can make it sometimes hard to relate to people, or hard to feel heard. Especially when you're living in a community that is really revolved around families and specifically the husband/wife structure.

Since separating, I find my social life changing, and the people I spend time with different. Because when you're struggling, you want someone to know what it's like.

About a year ago, I saw an advertisement for a paint party night for single moms in another city approximately 2 hours away by bus. I'd wanted to go to a paint night since they started becoming popular in my area, but they usually were out of my budget. However, this paint night was subsidized by an organization that helps single moms in that city, so not only was it very affordable, it also was with a bunch of other single moms. And when I went to it, I had such a blast, and came home thinking "Oh my gosh, I found my tribe."


It is so incredibly validating to spend time with people who've been there, done that, and are able to be supportive of you because of their life experience. And to meet people who are also going through similar, to be a support system.

That city, I found out, has regular events for single moms, including barbecues, get togethers, parenting as a single parent workshops, and though I live quite far away, I've joined them for more than one event, because it is just such a beautiful fun and validating environment.

I've looked to create a local group here for single moms, but so far haven't had much luck. So there I go.

Earlier this week I was in for a big treat. They had a single mom's day out to a hotel on a beach with a spa. The event cost $15 because it was subsidized heavily by the city and this charity that supports the single moms group, and it included a full day pass to all the hotel's facilities, lockers, jacuzzis, swimming pool, sulfur pools, saunas, gym, beach, towel service, and a full hotel buffet lunch. Not to mention the bus there and back.

I didn't think I'd be able to go, since first priority for the trip was for people in the city, since the city subsidized it, but I went on the waiting list and last minute I got told that there was room on the trip.

It was probably one of the best days I've had in a long time.

Glorious relaxing luxurious and fun, with really great company. I spent time with some good friends there and also made other friends, and it was just a blast.

I just wanted to share how important single mom friends are, and my appreciation for this organization and what they did for us.

If you're a single mom, get thee single mom friends. And go out and have fun together. You won't regret it.

(Oh, and the above picture? It wasn't even mine. I had so much fun that I didn't take out my phone even once! My friend let me use hers.)

2 comments:

  1. I am an adoptive mom and am looking forward to an annual event with my tribe in a couple of weeks! So glad you found that group!!

    ReplyDelete

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