You've Got to be Kidding Me!

I'd love to say that nothing shocks me anymore, I've seen and heard so much, but I just had a meeting this morning that made me so flabbergasted I'm reeling.

I've written before about the whole complicated and frustrating process I've been going through with my daughter Rose, getting her diagnosed with autism, because she presents it atypically because she's a girl. And how the child development clinic didn't agree that she has autism, because they wanted to blame everything on our bad marriage.

I've also mentioned that national insurance wanted to invite us for another evaluation for Rose because they didn't want to accept my two private evaluations, because the child development center says she doesn't have autism.

I was very very nervous about what would happen in this latest evaluation because the national insurance has a vested interested in not accepting her diagnosis because then they'd have to give her disability benefits. But the meeting went as well as can be expected and from my understanding from the doctor, he agrees with her autism diagnosis as well as really really strong ADHD.

So that's that, and I was told that I'll get a report and write up in a month to and month and a half. I wanted to update you about that and to say thank you for everyone that prayed or sent warm wishes or good thoughts.

But today though, I had a meeting with the social workers through social services who've been involved in my case (because of our contested divorce they've been involved), and they told me that they had to investigate a new report...

I'm pausing a moment for dramatic effect here.

Because this is such a what the heck situation that it deserves a little drama...

Apparently the child development clinic reported me to social services because...

I've been pursuing an Autism diagnosis for my daughter when she clearly doesn't have it.

I know, right?

I'm just as shocked as you are.

Because the worst thing a mother can possibly do for her child that is struggling is getting help for her kid, and when one avenue refuses to help because of their preconceived biases (they went into the situation deciding that all her issues were because of our unhealthy family situation, and just used everything they did to affirm their preconceived biases), going to other avenues.

When I told the social services that she got another diagnosis from a psychiatrist, and then on top of that, the National Insurance doctor agreed with the diagnosis, they backed off. (Of course they want proof of that, but they're just doing their due diligence.)

But what I really can't get over is the child development center accusing me of harming my child by putting her in special ed and "labeling her", enough to report me to social services for that.

I am disgusted.

I had such a low opinion of this child development services to begin with, not just from my experience but from others who used them, that I was considering switching health insurance providers (even though I like the doctors on my insurance) to be able to be eligible for a different child development service.

But its one thing for them to refuse to help my daughter and give her services she needs, but quite another to report me to social services for actually getting her the help she needs.

The biggest problem would be to ignore my daughters issues and not get her help and not give her as much chances as she can to succeed in life as has happened to many people I know.

I can't believe they're not only covering their tracks for their malpractice, but are accusing me of harming my daughter by actually getting her help.

I just needed to share this update to this situation.

And more than anything, I'm so, so, so, so happy that my daughter is part of this study on the difference between girls and boys with autism. Because this child development services definitely needs to get updated.

Penniless Parenting

Mommy, wife, writer, baker, chef, crafter, sewer, teacher, babysitter, cleaning lady, penny pincher, frugal gal


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  1. My daughter had a 504 plan for school, where she was allowed to miss more days of school than usually allowed because of her frequent migraines. (Diagnosed by a child neurologist.) So then of course the school reported me to child protective services because guess what, my daughter missed many days of school.

  2. I wonder if your ex-husband had anything to do with this.

  3. The child development team is tc? They are known for being ridiculous.

    Rose does sound a lot like adhd. How does an autism diagnosis differ?

  4. And as you say the system has a vested interest in not going further. I'm appalled but not shocked. (Okay, some shocked...thought this just happened in the US.)

    Good luck. And I'm curious what comes of the ADHD issues. A friend of mine (young adult) is a woman with ADHD and has had a hard time getting a diagnosis. In the meantime, untreated ADHD has made her life very, very difficult. I can only imagine how much smoother and happier things would have gone if she'd been diagnosed as a child and received meds as necessary plus CBT. Medical marijuana seems to help, but she's and adult.

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